


Waltz of Four Left Feet

by matchasnow



Category: CLC (Band)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-13
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2019-05-21 16:54:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14919257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/matchasnow/pseuds/matchasnow
Summary: Is there anything worse than falling for your straight best friend?[HIATUS]





	1. Run Away With Me

**Author's Note:**

> Finally decided to create my own AO3 account. Anyway, I'm starting by cross-posting some of my stories from AFF.  
> This one's CLCxPristin (forgive me, I'm still a noob with the tags).

It’s a hot early autumn afternoon. The sun’s well up on Yujin’s purple skies. It spins and pops, rides the rhythm and the beat of the explicit pop song playing on the practice room’s speakers. It even glares at its own reflection on the floor to ceiling mirror. It whips its hair around so viciously that its ponytail comes undone, long silky black hair cascading down the sides of its face like glorious sun rays. Yujin’s too caught up in watching that she fails to notice that the song has ended. The sun takes light graceful steps towards her, leans down to where she sat, breathless, on the rubberized wood floor.

 

“Umm, earth to Jinie?”

 

Yujin’s coughs, looks away from the sun’s face to avoid being blinded.

 

“What are you doing? I said pass me my water bottle.”

 

“Oh, right. Sorry, Yeonie…” Yujin mutters, grabs the orange water bottle with the tiny monkey prints all over and hands it to the sun.

 

The sun rolls its eyes at her and she feels her face heat up even more so she grabs her own water bottle (pink and with bunny prints!) and takes a long drink off it for something to do. She does her best to keep her eyes strained on the hem of her training pants, on the floor, or on the windows, anywhere but at the sun. She can’t afford to be blinded again. She can’t afford to get lost in the light even more than she already is.

 

At that moment, the practice room door flies open and one of their classmates walk in.

 

“Oh, Yujin! Seungyeon!”

 

“Hey, Momo!” Yujin pipes up, grateful for the distraction.

 

“Are you guys coming to the Freshmen Welcoming Night later? It’s gonna be at the sorority house and most of us are coming. Chungha asked me to come get you two, actually.” Momo says with a hopeful grin.

 

Yujin wastes no time answering. “Oh, we’d love to!”

 

“Actually…” But Seungyeon mutters then trails off. Yujin turns to her and she finds that she’s starting to look a lot like herself now and less like the sun.

 

“Actually what?” Yujin asks, prepares herself for disappointment.

 

“I have plans with Soonyoung tonight.” Seungyeon whispers, avoids her eyes.

 

Yujin thinks she can hear the ice caps melting all the way from the north pole. As those thick slabs of ice fall into the dark waters of the Arctic ocean, she feels her heart plummeting to the depths of her stomach. The sun is being too much today it seems.

 

“I thought you broke up with him?” Yujin whispers back.

 

Momo clears her throat awkwardly, eyes darting between the two. “Should I go? I mean, if you guys haven’t made a decision yet, you can just text me or Chungha to confirm.”

 

“I did. But he wants to meet up and talk so…” Seungyeon starts shuffling on her feet.

 

“And you agreed? Have you forgetten what he did?” Yujin is almost hissing now.

 

“Yeah, I’m gonna go. Text me or whatever.” Momo scratches the back of her head and laughs awkwardly then exits the room lightning fast, leaving the two of them.

 

Seungyeon sighs when the door shuts, starts to speak louder. “He said he’s going to explain everything to me later. I want to, at least, know, Jinie! You know more than anyone that I need to know what his reasons were!”

 

“But Yeonie…” It comes out whiny. She even adds in a pout and a foot stomp for good measure, hoping it’ll get through to her.

 

“Jinieeeeeee” Seungyeon whines back, grabs her by the arm and shakes her. She brings her face a little closer, making sure that Yujin’s looking her in the eye. “I know what I’m doing. You don’t have to be so protective. I can take care of myself.”

 

It takes a tremendous effort for her but she holds Seungyeon’s puppy-eyed gaze with a frown of her own. A few more minutes of this and she’s sure that she’ll break her but Seungyeon starts to up her game by wrapping her arms around her.

 

“I really do appreciate your concern, Jinie. But can you please trust me on this one?”

 

Yujin wants to retaliate. Maybe throw a tantrum and go: _This one? This one? I’ve trusted you with all one million of these! I trusted you with every single one of your dumb decisions!_ But all that comes out of her mouth is “Oh, fine.”

 

“Yaaaaay!” Seungyeon exclaims, pulls her even closer for a hug and nuzzles their cheeks together. “Love you, Jinie!”

 

Yujin’s stomach does a painful twist and her skin starts to feel like it’s on fire.

 

“Eww, let go of me! You’re sweaty!” She exclaims, pushes a laughing Seungyeon away.

 

She turns her back on her and busies herself with gathering her things on the floor, all the while trying not to think about the ‘love you’ that was so casually thrown at her. It doesn’t mean anything. It can’t mean anything.

 

“But you’ll still go with Momo and the others, right?” Seungyeon asks just as she’s finished packing her bag.

 

Yujin frowns at her. “Huh? But you’re not going so why should I?”

 

“Jinie! No! You should go!” Seungyeon sighs. “I mean Sorn is probably going to her department’s freshmen night thing too. And that’ll leave you to be by yourself at your dorm so why not just hang out with the other second years?”

 

Because it’s not worth going to if you won’t be there. Can’t you see I just want to be with you? Can’t you see that I’m so hopelessly in love with you? Don’t meet up with him. He’s just gonna break your heart again. Stay with me instead. But she can’t ever say those words out loud.

 

“But…” So Yujin racks her brains for some other excuse but-

 

“Please go.” Seungyeon. Again. With. The. Puppy. Eyes.

 

It comes out of her mouth before she even makes up her mind. “Fine. I’ll call Momo.”

 

\--

 

And so later that night, Yujin finds herself tagging along with a handful of other second year dance majors, to a party she didn’t even want to attend. Maybe she can slip out quietly without the others noticing? It’s a Thursday night after all. Her new favorite web drama has probably released a new episode by now. And it’s after 8 too. All the bread at her favorite bakery would be 50% off now! That could work. She’ll forget about Seungyeon meeting up with that stupid boyfie of hers by drowning herself in cream buns and lesbian dramas!

 

She’s just thinking about this when Chungha loops an arm around hers and drags her past the snack table and to a group of upperclassmen huddled on the corner of the room. Names and greetings are exchanged and they all get their first drink for the night. Chungha whispers something to her ear about getting more drinks. Momo and Lisa and said something about looking for their friends. Junhui and Minghao leave to maybe make out.

 

Left to her own devices, Yujin decides to take a seat on the couch to think. Leaving so quickly would definitely hurt Chungha’s feelings. If she could stay for a couple more drinks and then pretend that she’s going to meet, maybe, Sorn or Yeeun, she wouldn’t be hurting anyone’s feelings!

 

Yujin smiles to herself, feels like a total genius for coming up with such a brilliant plan. She takes sips off her bottle and looks around the room, quietly thinking about what could’ve happened to her favorite character in that drama and which flavor of cream buns to get. She’s so deep in thought that she barely feels the cushion next to her sink. She turns her head mindlessly only to find a burly drunk guy looking at her.

 

“Hey,” The guy says to her.

 

Yujin looks away and pretends not to have heard or seen him.

 

“Couldn’t help but notice that you’re all alone.” She grits her teeth. _No shit, sherlock._

 

This is why she didn’t want to go to this party. She always gets the brainless douche bags hitting on her. And why is Chungha taking so long to get those drinks?

“I’ll tell you my name if you let me get you a drink.” The guy presses on.

 

Yujin spares him a dirty look before she gets up to walk away but the guy catches her by the wrist. “Hey, don’t go so quickly.”

 

Her mind reviews all the self-defense techniques she learned with Seungyeon back in middle school but before she could put one to play, someone else interrupts.

 

“Hey! She doesn’t want to know your name neither does she want another drink. She already has one. So, why don’t you get lost?”

 

Yujin turns and sees Im Nayoung, the scary looking (Seungyeon’s words not hers) 3rd year, staring coldly at the guy. He’s too stunned to speak, maybe it’s the authority in Nayoung’s voice or the look on her eyes that’s ready to kill, but either way Yujin takes the chance to pull her hand out of his hold and proceeds to step up next to the older girl quietly.

 

Nayoung doesn’t drop the death glare and her guy friend (Yujin thinks he’s called Seungcheol) calls to some 3rd years.

 

“Aren’t you guys with him?” Seungcheol asks. “He’s making her feel really uncomfortable. I think it’s time for him to go.”

 

“He just came in with us and we don’t really know him…” One of them says.

 

“Nah, it’s fine. We’ll take the trash out.” The other one says.

 

The two of them scoop the drunk guy away and drag him to the exit. When they’re out of sight, Yujin is finally able to breathe. She wasn’t even aware that she was holding her breath.

 

“Are you okay?” Nayoung turns to her, voice now gentle, face serious but with a softer look. “You’re Chungha’s friend, right?”

 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks.” Yujin hears herself say.

 

“That’s good then.” Nayoung takes a seat on an unoccupied arm chair and Yujin sits back down on the couch.

 

Seungcheol, however, seems to be frozen for a moment, eyes looking to the door. “Nayoung-ah, Jeonghan just came in so I’m gonna go.” He unfreezes and smirks at Nayoung.

 

Nayoung rolls her eyes at him. “Fine, leave, you traitor.”

 

“Uhuh. I’ll definitely get some tonight. Thanks for wishing me luck, bub.” Seungcheol replies with a wave.

 

“I hope you choke on your own spit right before you suck his dick, bitch.” Nayoung calls to him as he disappears in the crowd.

 

Yujin can’t help but laugh at their interaction.

 

“You guys are best friends?” She asks when Nayoung gives her a curious stare.

 

“Yeah. Gay best friends. So much fun.” Nayoung deadpans.

 

Chungha finally comes back with a girl in tow. They each carry beer in pack of sixes in their free hands. Chungha even has a long neck bottle with her which she sets down on the coffee table in front of them. A closer look tells Yujin that it’s tequila.

 

“Hey, you two are getting chummy!” Chungha exclaims, points to her and Nayoung. “Good for you!”

 

“That’s ‘cause you took too long to come back!” Yujin replies, crossing her arms over her chest to express her annoyance.

 

“Well, that’s ‘cause Sejeong and I-” Chungha never gets to finish because Nayoung cuts her off.

 

“Ugh! Stop! We don’t want to hear about what you two were doing!” She even covers her ears with her hands.

 

Yujin takes notice of the girl with Chungha. “You’re a music major, aren’t you? I think I remember seeing you with Sorn once. What are you doing here?”

 

Sejeong nods then shrugs. “My baby’s here so I’m here.” She replies simply, throws her arms around Chungha.

 

“I’m not drunk enough for this.” Nayoung complains, reaches for one of the canned beers.

 

“Hey! Not so fast. That’s for truth or dare.” Chungha swats Nayoung’s hand away and Yujin wonders why she’s speaking and acting so casually around a senior and a highly respected one at that. They must be really close.

 

“Fine. Call the others so we can start this stupid game.” Nayoung mutters.

 

“Yujin, don’t even think about leaving. You’re playing. We’re all playing.” Chungha says to her when she makes to get up.

 

She purses her lips, catches Nayoung’s eye as she does but the older girl only shrugs at her.

 

\--

 

It takes them three rounds of truth or dare before they start to run out of shots. Chungha’s borderline drunk at this point so Sejeong, who stayed sober for her, left to get some more hard liquor for all of them. They’re all (minus Yujin) still so insistent on playing anyway.

 

Yujin swirls the contents of her beer can, trying to figure out how much is left inside. Nayoung, who sits across from her, tips her last can dry and looks around the table for another one. For some reason, she’s been drinking a lot even when it’s not her turn.

 

Chungha slams her palms on the table and then gestures to the last shot of tequila there.

 

“Nayoungieeeee,” Chungha drawls then gives her a smile. “It’s your turn! Truth or dare?”

 

“Dare.” Nayoung says easily. Momo whistles. Shia and Mihyun (Nayoung’s classmates who decided to join the game) both groan.

 

“You’re gonna regret picking dare.” There’s a weird glint in Chungha’s eyes that makes Yujin nervous. “Okay. I dare you to go… seven minutes in the closet with Yujin!”

 

“Chungha, what the fuck!” Yujin hisses as she leans towards the girl.

 

“What? Why? No one’s going to get hurt if you do. And girl, you gotta let go of that unrequited love of yours.” Chungha says to her which makes her want to retaliate.

 

“ANNNND Nayoungie can just drink if she doesn’t want to do the dare like she’s been doing all night.” Chungha slurs loudly for the group to hear.

 

Yujin looks at Nayoung for help but the girl has already stood up.

 

“Oops. I guess she doesn’t want to drink.” Momo exclaims dramatically, earning gasps from the others.

 

Yujin wants to argue and she really should but something about the empty look in Nayoung’s eyes made her forget her words. Nayoung starts moving towards the closet on the hall and Yujin’s feet follow her.

 

“We’ll be running the time so don’t think about cheating!” Someone calls after them.

 

The closet door closes with a snap behind Yujin. She’s hyper aware of how fast her heart beats inside her chest and how cold sweat starts to drip down her back. The air is becoming hot too. There’s barely enough space for the two of them there and Nayoung’s long arms are up against the wall behind her, trapping her in between (how did she not notice before that the third year is a lot taller than her?).

 

“Sorry but I thought going in here would be a lot better than getting teased for the next couple of weeks.” Nayoung says. “We don’t have to do anything. We can just sit, er, stand and wait until the time’s up.”

 

Yujin nods, trains her eyes to the peeling paint on the wall behind Nayoung’s head, close to her ear. She thinks of things to talk about to relieve the awkward tension.

 

“Have you and Chungha always been close?”

 

Nayoung nods, a small smile on her lips. “We were in the same dance club in high school. I was born late in the year and I studied early but we’re basically same age friends.”

 

“Ah, I see.” Yujin mutters in a way that suggests it’s Nayoung’s turn to ask a question.

 

Fortunately, she picks up on it. “If you don’t mind me asking… where’s your friend?”

 

“Sorry? My friend?”

 

“The short tan one. The other second year who’s always with you. Well, not always, I guess.” Nayoung trails off.

 

“Ah, you mean Seungyeon?” Yujin suddenly wishes she had some alcohol to chase down the aftertaste of saying her name.

 

“Yeah, her. I see you two together around the department a lot. I’ve always thought you were dating but Chungha said otherwise.”

 

Yujin lets out a laugh but she wasn’t expecting it to come out all bitter.

 

“You think we’re dating?” Nayoung looks at her curiously and she shakes her head at her. “I wish we were but yeah… And she has somewhere else she needs to be tonight.”

 

A beat of silence. And Yujin could’ve let it stretch on until their time was up or could’ve just asked another question but her mouth decides to keep on going.

 

“Actually, more like ‘wants to be’. If you ask me she doesn’t really need to be there with that guy.” She almost spits. She can feel the anger she had been holding back until now bubble up inside her, some even seep through the cracks of her façade made by the alcohol. “Unnie, they don’t even look good together!”

 

She catches Nayoung’s eye and takes in the sad look on the older girl’s face. Yujin’s anger vaporizes just as quickly as it came, only to be replaced with hopelessness. She deflates and her head ends up resting on Nayoung’s shoulder.

 

“I’m sorry about this but can I just rest my head for a bit?” She asks in a small voice.

 

“Yeah, sure.” Nayoung replies.

 

“Seungyeon and I have known each other since middle school. I’ve always been by her side all this time but… it’s tiring, you know? It hurts a lot when I see her around all these guys. And that guy she’s with right now… that’s like the fourth guy she’s been with since we started uni!”

 

Yujin feels Nayoung’s hand patting her head, awkwardly but comfortingly.

 

A thought clicks in Yujin’s head and she looks up at Nayoung, their faces close to each other.

 

“What about you though? Why are you drinking so much?”

 

“Let’s just say that while you seem to be in love with your straight best friend, I’m into someone who’s way out of my league.” Nayoung says.

 

“Is it Seungcheol?” Yujin asks.

 

“What? No!” Nayoung exclaims, shudders visibly at the thought, making Yujin laugh.

 

“Hey, do you want to get out of here?” She offers.

 

“Here here? They’re supposed to let us know if the time’s up.”

 

“I meant here. Like leave the party.”

 

Nayoung’s mouth forms an O. “Will they ever let us live this down though?” She wonders.

 

Yujin starts to feel rebellious. “Let them think want they want to think. So are you in or not?”

 

Nayoung smiles again. “Yeah, sure. I’m in.”

 

 


	2. Unfortunately For Us

Seungyeon really does try not to run but too many thoughts are going through her head right now. She needs someone to talk to. And maybe someone to hug. Right. She needs her best friend. _She needs Yujin_. She skips the last few steps to get to the sorority house where the party is, knowing that Yujin will still be there. It’s only a little past eleven after all. No one leaves a party that early.

 

She gets there and wastes no time looking for her, pushing past the bodies on the dance floor, evading people she knows who might want to talk to her. She heads for the couches where she sees their classmates together. Chungha is barely conscious and is being held up by a girl as she walks up to them.

 

“Chungha? Are you okay?” She asks, cautiously.

 

Chungha looks up at her, smiles, and holds a thumb up weakly.

 

“Yeah, she’s gonna be fine once she sobers up.” The girl holding her up says, quickly recognizes the suspicious look on her face. “I’m Sejeong, by the way. I’m Chungha’s girlfriend.”

 

“Oh, cool. I’m Seungyeon.” Seungyeon replies, feels at ease knowing who the girl was. Chungha wouldn’t stop talking about her so she knows her by name but it’s her first time seeing her. “Listen, do you happen to know where Yujin is?”

 

“Yujin? Oh, she already left. Like maybe half an hour ago?” Sejeong says. Seungyeon’s just about to thank her and take off (knowing that she’ll be at her dorm by now) but Sejeong apparently had more to say. “She left with Nayoung and they were in a hurry. If you know what I mean.”

 

Seungyeon blinks in surprise at that cheeky smile and was that an innuendo? “I’m sorry? I don’t think I know what you mean?”

 

Sejeong looks back at her blankly. Chungha leans more into her and she smiles a sheepish smile. “Maybe you should ask Momo. She’s probably in the kitchen. I really have to get Chungha to bed now, you see. Sorry.”

 

Confused and desperate for answers, Seungyeon takes her advice and heads to the kitchen. She runs into Momo at the door.

 

“Oh, hey, Seungyeon, you showed up! But Yujin left already-” The girl greets her.

 

“Yeah, I was gonna ask you about that. Sejeong just told me that she left? With some Nayoung girl?” She asks, eyebrows raised in expectation.

 

“Shush! Not some Nayoung girl! Nayoung sunbae, Seungyeon.” Momo says, eyes wide like she just said something ridiculous. “Im Nayoung sunbae? The president of the department’s student council, Nayoung sunbae!”

 

A look of recognition crosses her face. That still doesn’t explain things though. “But why?”

 

“What do you mean why? They are,” Momo does some obscene hand gestures all the while giving her a look with her eyebrows both raised. “You know?”

 

“No, I don’t know!” Seungyeon exclaims. She’s getting tired of all this.

 

Momo sighs in defeat, brushes her hair back with her hands. “Alright. Look, we all played some drinking games together and they got, um, _very_ friendly, like touchy friendly, when Chungha dared them to do seven minutes in the closet and they had to take it _higher_.”

 

It starts to click in her head. _No, it can’t be._

 

“Are you saying that Yujin left with Nayoung sunbae because they’re going to have sex?” Momo’s quick to clamp a hand to her mouth. Even looks around them to check if anyone overheard.

 

“Not so loud, Seungyeon! We don’t want to ruin things for your best friend now, do we?” Seungyeon slaps Momo’s hand away and pushes her back, angrily.

 

“Why are you so chill about this?” She asks annoyed.

 

“Uh, Seungyeon, this is Nayoung sunbae we are talking about. She’s a great catch!” Momo says like it’s the most logical thing.

 

“And what about Yujin?” She gives Momo a fierce stare.

 

“What about her? They’re both single and attractive. They’ll be fine. Yujin’s in _good hands_ , if you know what I mean.” Momo wiggles her eyebrows at her again.

 

“Why is everyone saying that?” Seungyeon complains, throws her hands in the air.

 

“Because we’re happy for Yujin!” Momo exclaims but then her face takes on a serious look. “And really, don’t you think it’s about time she finds someone?”

 

“But… a girl?” Seungyeon asks, helpless.

 

“Wait.” Momo looks intently at Seungyeon’s face, finally realizes it. “Oh, dear… You didn’t know?”

 

“That she’s into girls?” Seungyeon hates to admit it but it’s the truth. “No, she never told me.”

 

Momo gives her a really sorry look and she can’t take it anymore. She pulls her phone out of her pocket and dials Yujin’s number. She has to know for herself.

 

“Seungyeon, don’t. She probably won’t even pick up.” Momo says, quietly.

 

“Thanks for your help, Momo. But I think I’ll take my chances.” She replies, obstinate.

 

“Yeah, well, good luck with that. I’m gonna go find Mina.” So Momo leaves her to be by herself.

 

\--

 

Yujin’s phone doesn’t even ring and just goes straight to voicemail. And Seungyeon has been trying for the past half hour but still no luck. Without even thinking about where she’s going, her feet take her to Yujin’s dorm. Maybe a part of her is still hoping that Momo was just pulling her leg.

 

She knocks on her dorm room and is greeted by Yujin’s roommate.

 

“Hey, Sorn. Is Yujin here?” She asks, allows herself to feel a little hopeful.

 

But is quickly brought down. “She isn’t.”

 

Sorn doesn’t miss the worried look on her face and asks. “Is something wrong, Seungyeon?”

 

“I’m not really sure.” She mutters, staring into space. “Anyway, will you tell her to call me once she gets back?”

 

“Yeah, sure. But are you leaving now? Why don’t you stay and wait for a bit? She never does stay out this late so she must be on her way back now. And unnie’s here so why not say hi?” Sorn opens the door wider to invite her in.

 

Seungyeon wants to say that Sorn’s right, Yujin never does stay out this late but tonight she might. Tonight, she will. But she doesn’t have the energy to say that so she just says. “It’s okay. I’m kind of tired now so I’ll just head upstairs. Thanks, Sorn.” After that, she walks away.

 

As Sorn watches her go, her girlfriend, Seunghee, peeks through the open door. “Is that Seungmonkey?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“What’s got her looking so sad?” Seunghee asks.

 

“She wouldn’t tell me.” Sorn replies. “Should we be worried, unnie?”

 

“Eyy, it’s Seungyeon. She’s strong. She’ll tell us if it’s something we need to know.”

 

“Yeah. I hope she does.”

 

\--

 

Seungyeon walks in her dorm with her head down, feeling too out of it at the moment. She only looks up once to locate the light switch to flick it on. When the lights come on, she thinks she might have heard a shriek and a thud by the living room. But she doesn’t have the energy to confirm right now.

 

“S-Seungyeon unnie?” She hears Yeeun’s soft voice, albeit a little flustered, from somewhere behind the couch. And sure enough, the younger girl peeks her head from there.

 

“Oh, Yeeunie.” Seungyeon says, gloomily. “You’re still up? Don’t you have classes tomorrow?”

 

“Not until the afternoon, no.” Yeeun gets up from her spot and sees her better. “Are you… are you alright?”

 

Seungyeon nods, slowly. “I’m gonna go to bed. Don’t stay up too late, okay? Good night, you two.”

 

She disappears into her bedroom, completely missing the way Yeeun’s face blushes deep red. Tingyan sits up next to her.

 

“She knew I was here?” Tingyan whispers.

 

“Well, we weren’t exactly being covert, were we?” Yeeun hisses.

 

“Yeeun-ah, we’ve been dating for a year now! You and I are adults now, too. There’s no need. And it’s just kissing.” Tingyan pulls Yeeun closer to resume what they were doing before they were interrupted but Seungyeon’s door swings open again.

The older girl dramatically holds her arm out to the doorframe as she steps out.

 

“I have a question for you two.”

 

Yeeun pulls away so quickly Tingyan barely has enough time to stop her momentum, almost kisses the carpet.

 

“Yes, Seungyeon unnie?” Yeeun asks, ignores the grumbling sound Tingyan makes.

 

“Did you two know about Yujin?” Seungyeon asks, a determined look on her face.

 

“What about Yujin unnie?”

 

“That she’s… she’s gay.” She whispers as if they weren’t the only ones in the room.

 

The two younger girls share looks.

 

“Umm, you know, unnie?” Yeeun asks, careful.

 

“So you knew.” Seungyeon concludes. She sighs and runs her hand through her hair, preparing herself to hear the worse. “Did she tell you guys?”

 

“Well, she didn’t have to tell us, unnie. It was pretty obvious.” Tingyan says, getting up to her feet.

 

“How did you know though?” Yeeun asks her, concern etched on her face.

 

“It’s a long story.” Seungyeon says with another sigh. “How could I miss it?”

 

Yujin never had a boyfriend. She barely even talked about boys. She loves Hayley Kiyoko’s music. She’s a huge fan of girl groups and even has a twitter account for lesbian ships. Tingyan’s right. It was pretty obvious.

 

“Unnie?” Yeeun calls to her. “I’m getting worried here.”

 

“Oh, don’t be, Yeeunie. I just need to process some things. I’ll leave you two to it then.” Seungyeon retreats to her bedroom again.

 

Tingyan and Yeeun share looks again. “Should we call Seunghee unnie or something?”

 

\--

 

She barely gets any sleep that night. Her mind is too occupied by thoughts of her best friend that she even forgot why she was looking for her in the first place. Yujin’s gay. She’s into girls. For how long? Why didn’t Seungyeon notice? And why didn’t Yujin tell her? Now she’s with Nayoung sunbae, a girl Seungyeon barely knows. And she’s losing her virginity to her. Is it even Yujin’s first time? Seungyeon isn’t even sure anymore because she didn’t even know about her sexuality. What kind of best friend is she? Why did she have to know this way?

 

She shakes her head. No. Maybe, just maybe, this is all just a bad dream and she’s going to wake up soon to find that none of it is true.

 

But her alarm confirms that it isn’t. She sits up on her bed and sees the first rays of the sun peeking at the horizon. This is her reality. Everything that happened last night _really happened_. And now, it’s time to get ready for class. She takes her head in her hands and groans.

 

Still, the bright side is that she’ll see Yujin in class. And she can ask her face to face. Motivated by this, she jumps off the bed and hits the shower. When she finishes, she walks out to the kitchen to find a half-asleep Tingyan frying eggs on the stove. She politely declines the offered breakfast and just grabs some toast to go and leaves.

 

She left way earlier than she usually does and so ends up being the first person to arrive in class. She sits on her usual seat, places her bag on Yujin’s to save it for her. She waits out the twenty minutes for class to start. Yujin’s not exactly an early riser. But she comes right on time. The other empty seats fill but still no Yujin. The ten-minute grace period ticks by and soon the professor is closing the lecture hall’s door.

 

Seungyeon starts to panic. Yujin never was one to skip class! She looks up and down the hall, trying to see if Yujin just took another seat or came in late and was too shy to walk up to theirs which is in the middle. But the whole class rolls by and she sees neither hide nor hair of her.

 

She hurries off to the next class, praying that Yujin will attend that one. She sets her bag down on her usual seat. Some of her classmates are already there, talking loudly about last night’s party or something else. Chungha’s passed out on the third row and Momo’s on her usual pre-start of class PDA session with Mina. Junhui and Minghao didn’t even show.

 

A knocking on her desktop catches her attention and she looks up to see Soonyoung smiling down at her.

 

“Oh, hey,” is all she manages to say.

 

“I just thought I’d come say hi. And, well, thanks for last night.” Soonyoung starts.

 

“Yeah… it’s cool. No need to say thanks. If anything, I should be the one saying thanks.” She replies.

 

“Right. We’re cool.” Soonyoung says with that smile she likes. “Actually, I was wondering if you wanna join us for lunch today? I just thought-”

 

There’s a round of obnoxious coughing from behind Soonyoung that cuts him off. Seungyeon looks behind him and a frowning Yujin comes into view.

 

“Sorry not sorry but you’re in my seat, Kwon Soonyoung.” She holds her backpack straps in each hand as she glares up at Soonyoung. If the situation weren’t so tense, Seungyeon would have laughed because she looks so much like an angry bunny right now.

 

Soonyoung looks like he’s holding back his laughter too but he backs away from the aforementioned seat. Even raises his hands up in surrender.

 

“I’ll go. I’ll go.” He says. “I’ll talk to you later then, Seungyeon.”

 

“Yeah. Talk to you later.”

 

Yujin doesn’t drop the glare until Soonyoung’s back in his seat at the other end of the classroom. When she relaxes and takes her seat, Seungyeon’s immediately over her. She holds her by her shoulders and looks her up and down. However, she doesn’t dare to roll up the sleeves of her jacket or to see past the collar of her shirt. She’s afraid of how she’d react if she finds _anything_ there.

 

“Uh? Yeonie?” Yujin asks, confused.

 

“She hasn’t done anything bad to you, has she?” Seungyeon looks and looks but finds nothing.

 

“She? Who are we talking about?” Yujin asks, still confused and now slightly pink in the face.

 

Seungyeon sighs then gives her a look. She lets go of Yujin and leans back on her desk. “You don’t have to hide anything from me, Jinie. I know.”

 

Yujin only looks at her with that dumb look on her face.

 

“I know about Nayoung sunbae and the closet and what happened after. And you being in a figurative closet too, I guess.” Seungyeon mumbles.

 

Yujin starts to look serious now. “Y-you know? How?”

 

“I came looking for you at the party but you already left. Momo told me everything.” Seungyeon says.

 

Yujin nods slowly. “And?”

 

“And I can’t believe you didn’t tell me!” It comes out louder than she means it too, even Mina and Momo turn to look at them once so she lowers her voice. “Why didn’t you tell me? Jinie, we’re best friends! We don’t keep secrets from each other.”

 

Yujin looks away from her, trains her eyes on her desktop instead. “Well, I wasn’t sure how you’d take it. I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.”

 

“You really thought I was going to be disgusted with you? Choi Yujin! After all this time? How could you think that?” Seungyeon exasperates.

 

“I wasn’t sure about a lot of things, okay?” Yujin says in her defense. “I wasn’t sure if I like girls or if I only liked one girl…” The last part she mutters under her breath.  

 

“So you slept with Nayoung sunbae and now you know?” Yujin’s face turns blank and she becomes silent. However, Seungyeon doesn’t notice and keeps on going. “I guess I just felt betrayed because I thought I knew you best since you knew me best.”

 

“Stop.” Yujin clenches her fists by her side.

 

“Stop what?” Seungyeon turns to her, sees how the embarrassed look from before has turned into a look of anger.

 

“You don’t get to pull this crap on me, Chang Seungyeon!” She says. “How could you not know? I didn’t even have to formally come out to the others but they know! How did you not know? How did you not notice?” She’s almost hissing that it flusters Seungyeon.

 

“I… well, you got me there. Jinie, I’m really-”

 

Their professor makes an appearance and Yujin starts to deflate, slouches in her chair as she turns to the front. “Stop. I don’t want to talk anymore. Prof’s here so just… please stop.” She says weakly.

 

Neither of them says a word for the rest of the class. But that doesn’t stop Seungyeon from staring at Yujin the whole time. What could be going on in her head? What happened between her and that girl? Is she mad at her now?

 

The class ends and since it’s lunch time, everyone’s in a hurry to leave except for them, allowing a very awkward atmosphere to form between them. Yujin has her back pointedly turn on Seungyeon. She packs her things with one hand and uses her phone with the other. But Seungyeon wants to talk to her some more so she sucks it up and walks to her.

 

“Do you wanna grab lunch with me?”

 

“Aren’t you going to eat with Soonyoung?” Yujin doesn’t even looking up from her phone. “You can go with him. I already have plans, you see.”

 

“Plans? With who?” Seungyeon hates that she knows the answer to that already.

 

There’s a soft knock on the open door and Nayoung peeks in.

 

“Hey, Yujin. Ready to go?” She asks with a light smile on her beautiful face.

 

“Yup.” Yujin’s face brightens up immediately. And she walks to Nayoung so fast, she’s almost skipping.

 

“I’ll see you later, Seungyeon.” She says over her shoulder.

 

Seungyeon can only watch Yujin walk away from her and while she does, she catches Nayoung’s eye. The older girl gives a polite nod in her direction but something about it makes Seungyeon’s blood boil.

 

\--

 

Seungyeon ends up sharing a table with Sorn and Seunghee over lunch. She needed someone to talk to but she was still pretty bummed about the whole thing. Not really in the mood to relive everything, it comes as a relief to her when Sorn tells her she’s heard everything from Yeeun.

 

“You, dance majors, have such messy lives. Us, music majors, take so much pleasure in watching you all suffer and squirm from afar.” Seunghee says with a nasty smirk. 

 

“What unnie means is news like that spread like wild-fire. Even if you didn’t tell Yeeun anything, she already had it all figured out.” Sorn says.

 

“Yeah? What exactly did she tell you?” Seungyeon asks.

 

“Yujin hooked up with you guys’ smoking hot sunbae last night and now, she’s dating her.” Seunghee says. “AAAND, apparently, you didn’t know that your bff was gay.” She adds.

 

Seungyeon’s forehead hits the table with a thud. She lets out another groan. “Ugh. Please don’t tell me you guys knew too.”

 

“We did.” Sorn says in a sing song voice.

 

“Why am I surrounded by gays?” She complains.

 

“Girl, that’s ‘cause you’re gay too. You just don’t know it yet.” Seunghee says a matter-of-factly.

 

“You two are not helping.” Seungyeon sits up properly, pouts at them, and crosses her arms over her chest.

 

“Uhh, that look may work on Yujin but it won’t work on us, hun.” Seunghee says, starts picking at her leftovers.

 

Seungyeon frowns at her. “Well, it’s probably good for nothing now because she doesn’t even want to talk to me!”

 

“That’s ‘cause your stupidity has reached a new low and-”

 

“Did she really say that?” Sorn asks, cutting her girlfriend off.

 

“Well, not really.” Seungyeon mutters. “But you didn’t see the look on her face during class earlier. She must be really mad at me for not knowing.”

 

Sorn nods slowly like she’s thinking things through.

 

“There isn’t anything we can do about your insensitivity anymore but you can always apologize.” Seungyeon’s heart squirms at her choice of words but she knows it’s true.  

 

“Let me say that again. You _should_ apologize.” She offers her an understanding smile and adds. “Anyway, I’m sure she’ll forgive you. Because you’re Seungyeon. And she’s Yujin. Together you’re Yuyeon.”

 

“That’s true. And unfortunately for us, nothing, and I say nothing, is going to tear you two dumbasses apart.” Seunghee says.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like it if you guys can leave comments. Heh.


	3. A Good Bop On The Head

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Picking up the pace because I'm not planning on making this very long.

Yujin didn’t know what kind of reaction she was expecting from Seungyeon but she definitely knew that it was not that. She’d expected her to be disgusted. She would’ve totally understood if she wanted to stop being friends. But she was not expecting her to  get mad at her for not telling her firsthand. It’s unfair, really. But that’s alright because now, Yujin has the satisfaction of getting mad at Seungyeon for something very reasonable. 

 

She’d be lying if she says she wasn’t expecting news to spread this fast (Nayoung is, after all, a big name on campus and a much bigger name in the dance department). And she’s kinda happy that it did? She feels relieved that it’s out already. That she’s out already. To Seungyeon, that is. Things are going to change a lot and she may not be exactly ready for that but it’s a start. No more hiding, no more pretending. And if she’s going to be completely honest, a part of her thinks it could also be the start of letting go of her unrequited love of seven years. Yeah, she’s been in love with Seungyeon ever since middle school. Sue her. Anyway, Chungha can be rash at times but she may be right this time. 

 

These thoughts weigh heavy on her and she lets out a sigh. “Thanks for rescuing me, unnie.” And she means it. For what Nayoung did today. For what she did last night.

 

The older girl looks up from her lunch to give her a small smile.

 

“No biggie. I happened to be in the same building and I could use someone to have lunch with too, so…” 

 

Her thank you is waved off so quickly and so casually. Yujin doesn’t have the strength to clarify right now (in fear of ruining the light atmosphere) but she really does feel grateful. Nayoung’s appearance is just so timely. Like right now, she needs a bit more time to sort some things out with herself before she goes through the inevitable talk with Seungyeon and Nayoung gives her that.

 

“Don’t you usually eat with Chungha though?” Yujin asks to keep the conversation going, to keep herself distracted. And truthfully, she enjoys talking with Nayoung. Yujin figured out from last night that the older girl doesn’t talk much but she does answer questions patiently and honestly. 

 

“Uhh. No, not all the time. Not that often anymore, I guess, since she and Sejeong started going out. And actually, I’m kinda used to going back to my dorm during lunch time because my roommate often cooks for the two of us.” Nayoung answers.

 

Yujin’s eyes grow wide in both giddyness and realization. “Is it her? The girl you like?” 

 

Nayoung chuckles. “No. Sojung is… Sojung. I guess she’s one of my best friends. We’ve only ever been platonic. Anyway, she’s on student exchange right now.” She explains much to Yujin’s dismay.

 

“Ah, so that’s why I didn’t see her last night.” She pauses. 

 

“Who is it then?” And then presses on.

 

“You really want to know, huh?” Nayoung asks her and she nods her head enthusiastically. She really does. Maybe she can be of help to Nayoung too, like she is to her. 

 

“I guess it’s only fair that I tell you. You did tell me so much about you and Seungyeon.”  Nayoung says after much contemplation.

 

Yujin smiles sheepishly at her. She probably shouldn’t have but she got so frustrated not having anyone to talk to about her, about  _ it _ . At this point, she’s pretty sure that Nayoung’s a gift sent by the gods just to listen to her ramble.

 

The older girl takes some time again, plays with the aluminum foil wrapper of her kimbap until she finally decides to speak. “You probably don’t even know her but…”

 

A commotion erupts from the table next to them as a group of first years noisily occupy it. Nayoung stops and Yujin is distracted too. She wants to complain and maybe send a jab at the freshmen for being so loud in a public place but then, 

 

“Yujin unnie!” Yeeun shows up right next to her, smiles a smile full of  _ something _ at her. Which she doesn’t know what just yet.

 

“Oh, hey, Yeeunie!” Yujin greets back carefully. “Have you had lunch?”

 

“Yeah, Tingyan and I ate with her Chinese friends. We’re just here to brainstorm for a group project.” The younger girl points with her thumb to the first years on the next table. Her eyes pointedly dart sideways to Nayoung who looks too determined with staring at her food.

 

“Oh, right.” And Yujin finally understands. “Nayoung unnie, this is my friend, Yeeun. And Yeeun, this is Nayoung unnie. She’s a sunbae in our department.” So, she does the introduction.

 

Yujin watches their interaction closely, wary of anything weird Yeeun might do or say so she’s everything, sees how Nayoung looks up to smile at Yeeun but the moment she does, she starts coughing, choking on her food. Yujin quickly holds out her strawberry milk to her and she takes it, drinks off it. When her airway clears, she mutters a teary word of thanks to her.

 

“Yeeun? C’mon! We’ve got a presentation to prepare!” One of the Freshmen call out to Yeeun who quickly bids them goodbye to return to her classmates. 

 

Yujin’s curious gaze lands on Nayoung again but the older girl only resumes to staring at her food. Did she miss something?

 

“Don’t you have class in ten minutes? Eat up, Yujin.” The older girl reminds her after a minute of silence.

 

“Oh, right!” Yujin exclaims, chows down on the remains of her lunch.

 

\--

 

She doesn’t have any more classes for the afternoon but she has to practice and choreograph her parts for one of her and Seungyeon’s class presentations. They’re partners for this particular dance like they usually are in most of the performances that are required to be done in pairs but, now, Yujin catches herself wishing she’d just taken up someone else instead. 

 

She should’ve listened to Chungha much earlier. It really isn’t a good idea to be dancing with a person you want more than anything but can’t have because dancing means stripping yourself down to your soul and conveying the deepest and the strongest of your passions and emotions. She wonders how Seungyeon never noticed her feelings for her. And the answer is clear as the sun shining outside the window - she never noticed because she was never looking. 

 

Yujin decides she needs to get her mind off things and focus at the task at hand. She plugs her earbuds on her phone and puts the song on. She does the moves in front of the mirror, slowly at first as she recalls them, and at then with the beat as it comes to her. Her battered converse sneakers squeak lightly on the wooden flooring and she loses herself to dancing. She gets through one round, prepares to go for another, however, four consecutive  _ pings _ suddenly cut through the music playing and she stops to check the notifications. 

 

**Narong:** hey

**Narong:** i didn’t know that your seungyeon and i take the same jap class???

**Narong:** uhh things just got more interesting, i guess??? 

**Narong:** ;))

 

_ Jap class? _ Nayoung’s taking the same Japanese language elective as Seungyeon? 

 

Before Yujin knows it, she’s sprinting out of the practice room and cutting through the courtyard to get to the linguistics department building, the last message, the damned wink emoji burning through the back of her mind.

 

It’s true that Yujin and Nayoung have only known each other for less than 24 hours and it isn’t nice for her to think anything badly of her after all she’s done for her (especially, since Nayoung has a reputation being the dance department’s student council president) but she’s scared as fuck. Nayoung is mysterious and cunning and she’s friends with Chungha. The last fact alone means she’s capable of anything.  _ Damn, that wink emoji. _

 

Breathless, she skids to a stop outside the lecture hall where she knows Seungyeon’s (and well, Nayoung’s, too) Japanese class is at. The doors burst open not more than five minutes later and students start pouring out of the hall. She gets a couple of curious stares thrown her way but she doesn’t have the time to mind since she’s frantically looking for Nayoung.

 

“Oh, Yujin! What’re you doing here?” Nayoung asks, a look of casual surprise on her face. Yujin knows it’s fake.

 

She frowns and moves towards Nayoung, ready to give her a piece of her mind but the older girl suddenly steps to the side, pulls Yujin along with her so that they’re standing very close to each other. She then proceeds to wrap her arm around her shoulder and whisper to her ear.

 

“Just play along. You can thank me later.”

 

“Wha-” Yujn wants to ask but there’s a series of loud coughing behind them that gets her to stop and slowly turn. Her eyes widen  as she finds herself face to face with Seungyeon.

 

“Oh, hey, it’s Seungyeon, right?” Yujin hears Nayoung say, feels her pull away just a little. “You’re in this class too, huh?”

 

“Yes, sunbae-nim.” Seungyeon answers with a clenched jaw, eyes staring fiercely at Nayoung’s arm around Yujin before she turns to her. “What are you doing here,  _ Jinie _ ?”

 

“I, uh-” Yujin stammers, bothered by her bestfriend’s borderline hostile behavior.

 

Somehow, Nayoung finds it fun to add fuel to the fire. 

 

“Yeah, we were just texting. You didn’t have to run all the way here. You could’ve just replied on Katalk, you know?” Nayoung gives her a playful look (which is weird because she’s been blanked face all the time). “And really, what I was going to tell you was if you want to have dinner with me and my friends-”

 

“She can’t tonight! Sorry!” Seungyeon suddenly cuts Nayoung off. 

 

The older girl’s momentary surprise causes her to jump back a little, letting go off Yujin who is just as equally surprised. Seungyeon takes the opportunity and steps in between the two of them, puts her arm around Yujin protectively (or is it possessively?).

 

“We already have plans, you see.” Seungyeon explains to Nayoung, ignores the look of confusion on Yujin’s face

 

“No, we do-” She starts to say but Seungyeon’s arm tightens around her shoulders and she has to stop, feels the overwhelming need to swallow at their close proximity.

 

“Sorry, sunbae-nim.” Seungyeon looks up at Nayoung again but she does not even bother to look apologetic.

 

“That’s too bad.” Nayoung says, feigning disappointment (Yujin can tell because she chuckles after). “I guess, I’ll just see you tomorrow then, Yujin?”

 

“Y-yeah, unnie. See you.” Yujin stammers, watching the older girl leave. 

 

She and Seungyeon stand in awkward silence as they watch Nayoung’s figure get smaller and smaller before she disappears around the corner. Seungyeon’s arm is still around her shoulder and it starts to feel like a burning hot poker so Yujin steps a good foot away from her. 

 

“What?” Seungyeon asks at the look she gives her. She looks a bit calmer now, like she’s relieved about something.

 

“We don’t have plans for tonight and you know it.” Yujin says, accusingly.

 

“Yes, we do. We have to practice for street jazz.” Seungyeon replies simply.

 

Yujin frowns. “That isn’t going to take the whole night, though? We can finish before dinner time.”

 

Seungyeon takes a deep breath then frowns. “Are you upset that I foiled your plans with  _ your  _ Nayoung unnie?”

 

“Aha!” Yujin claps her hands together in an  _ I knew it  _ moment, jumping up a little. “So, you did foil my plans with  _ my _ Nayoung unnie! Why?” Seungyeon flinches at the emphasis and Yujin doesn’t understand why..

 

Her best friend opens her mouth then promptly closes it.

 

“I don’t trust her, Jinie. We barely even know her.” She mumbles.

 

“I know her a lot now.” Yujin points out. Seungyeon takes another deep breath.

 

“Can’t we just have the rest of the day together? Please?” Seungyeon says, looks down at her feet. “I’m sorry, okay? Jinie, I’m sorry.”

 

“I was a fool for not realizing it. Yujin, we’re best friends and I was wrong. You were right. You shouldn’t have to tell me. I should’ve been sensitive enough to see it. I just think it was not proper that I found out that way but still I’m sorry. Forgive me?” She looks back up at her and Yujin sees the pleading in her eyes.

 

She looks at her for a little while longer until she finally says “Okay, I forgive you.” 

 

Hurt from being blind to her feelings, and probably even deeper hurt from not having it returned, pushed aside, Seungyeon is still her best friend. She’s going to forgive her time and time again.

 

Seungyeon finally smiles and she pulls her in for a hug. Yujin just tries to savor it. She can’t deny the fact that her heart still races in her chest with Seungyeon’s touch. It makes her feel guilty like always but if she’s going to do something about her feelings for Seungyeon soon, things will change and this might be the last time she gets to hold her like this.

 

“Wanna go practice now?” Seungyeon asks as she slowly pulls away.

 

Yujin nods.

 

“Let’s go?” When Seungyeon offers her a hand, she takes it without second thoughts.

 

\--

 

Dancing with Seungyeon proved to be difficult just as Yujin had thought. It’s not about the parts in the choreography where they have to be very close to each other or where they have to be touching (whose brilliant idea was it to pick another explicit pop song?). That much Yujin already has experienced before and it doesn’t bother her as much now. What bothers her is Seungyeon’s gaze that never leaves her. 

 

She pretends she doesn’t notice it the first two times she catches her eye when she looks at their reflections on the mirror. She dismisses it when they stop for water break and all she can feel is the weight of Seungyeon’s gaze on her. Yujin doesn’t know if it’s funny or tragic because she used to be the one doing all the staring, albeit for very different reasons (and that’s where the tragic part comes in). And with years of knowing each other, Yujin can tell that Seungyeon’s trying to figure something out about her by just looking at her, by observing her because she’s too afraid to ask, too afraid to say something.

 

Practice goes on and ends like that (Yujin wonders if it will be like this from now). It’s not until they’re on their way home that Seungyeon finally says whatever is bothering her out loud.

 

“So Soonyoung and I talked last night…” Her voice is hesitant but effect is profound on Yujin.

 

The mere mention of that boy’s name still has her stomach filling with dread. Is Seungyeon just about to tell her that they getting back together? Is that why the two of them were talking in class this morning like nothing had happened between them? Are they starting over?

 

“He apologized for being such an ass and breaking up with me through text.” Seungyeon says.

 

“That’s good, I guess?” Yujin lowers her voice, keeps it at par with her expectations.  She’s probably in for another letdown anyway.

 

“And he explained everything to me. The thing is… he told me that he has known for a while.” Seungyeon stops walking and just looks at Yujin.

 

Anxiety bubbles up inside of her. Where is Seungyeon going with this and can she just hurry up with it? But she doesn’t say anything else like she’s considering her words very carefully which is unusual.

 

“Known for a while that...?” Yujin finally asks. 

 

“That he’s in love with Jihoon.” Seungyeon answers.

 

Yujin feels as though her eyes would pop out of their sockets at the revelation. “What? He’s gay?”

 

Seungyeon shakes her head at her and talks slowly again. “He said he doesn’t know about other boys but he’s sure that Jihoon is special to him.” 

 

She starts fiddling with her fingers, looks down then looks up at her. “I guess it’s kind of like what you told me. You weren’t sure if you liked girls or if you just liked one girl.”

 

Yujin shuts her mouth, purses her lips together, and shoves her hands in her pocket to the hide the fact that they’re shaking. So this is why she took so much time to say it.

 

“I mean, I was surprised when he told me but I realized that I can’t really hate him for that. Love is... love, you know? And I do sort of feel happy for the two of them. Even if Soonyoung basically strung me along and I was hurt.” Seungyeon continues.

 

Yujin just nods, not knowing what to say.

 

“I kinda realized how scary this whole sexuality thing is. Like there’s so much to discover and so much to learn about yourself. It must have been difficult for Soonyoung trying to figure things out on his own.”

 

There’s another pause. Yujin’s heart pounds crazily in her chest, a million thoughts running haywire through her mind.

 

“And for you too, Jinie. I’m really sorry for not being with you when you went through that. I mean, I was always with you but you couldn’t tell me and I didn’t catch on. I’m sorry.” Seungyeon looks very regretful.

 

Yujin just shakes her head. “It’s okay, Yeonie. It was something I had to do on my own.” Like how was she supposed to come out to her and tell her that she was in love with her this whole time?

 

They become silent for a while as they resume walking. Yujin drowning in her thoughts and going over possibilities that this revelation somehow opened up for her. When they neared the dorms, Seungyeon starts to speak again and she wishes that she hadn’t.

 

“That girl. Who is it?” Seungyeon asks with an unreadable expression on her face.

 

Yujin swallows. 

 

“Do you still feel that way? Like you only like her and not other girls?” She presses on, looks at her with that same searching gaze from earlier.

 

Yujin swallows harder. She licks her dry lips, not daring to look Seungyeon in the eye, fearing that if she does, she’ll finally get found out. 

 

“I’m still not sure, actually.” She whispers, hoping that an ambiguous answer will satisfy her.

 

“How come?” It doesn’t.

 

Yujin closes her eyes. Maybe being honest would be easier so she gives it a try.

 

“Well... I’ve been in love with her for the longest time but she doesn’t really know and... I’m thinking that even if she did, she won’t ever feel the same way about me so maybe I should just move on.” She shrugs as if it would hide the fact that she’s breaking inside.

 

“If you’re starting to think that way, I  guess that means Nayoung unnie treats you well.” Seungyeon mumbles. 

 

It’s Yujin’s turn to look at Seungyeon and really look at her. She doesn’t know. She really has no idea. She never noticed because she was never looking. 

 

Seungyeon mistakes her silence for a cue to keep on talking.

 

“As your best friend, I think you should try to let her know first before you decide. You never know, she might actually like you back. It’s just that she’s really dense and could use a good bop on the head.”

 

Yujin feels her entire world collapsing on her. She knew it was going to be like this but hearing it from Seungyeon herself just hurts on a whole nother level. 

 

“Wanna tell me who it is so that I can help you?” Seungyeon asks with a smile on her face. It’s cruel and she has had enough. Consequences be damned.

 

Yujin sighs in surrender and then with a courage she didn’t know she possessed, she took a step closer to Seungyeon. She raised her fist and softly hit the top of the girl’s head.

 

The silence that follows is deafening. Seungyeon looks at her with wide eyes as it finally hits her (literally and figuratively). 

 

Somehow, Yujin feels the need to say it out loud just so it’s crystal clear. “Yeah, it’s you, you idiot.”

 

She doesn’t wait for her response and just runs up the stairs to her dorm.


End file.
